Yin and yang

Wednesday, November 2, 2022

When it comes to disposition, the boyfriend and I are yin and yang. Where I’m tense, anxious, impatient, and… well, a bit neurotic, he’s calm, relaxed, and go-with-the-flow. I hate the flow. The flow is not scheduled. The flow has no plans. The flow has no idea what in the hell it’s doing.

All that being said, when it comes to the big things, we are simpatico… for the most part. We have the same tastes in music, books, tv, and even movies - although my ADHD doesn’t allow me to sit through many of those. We both love the calm of Fort Bragg, CA, and the peacefulness of Lake Tahoe. We love going to concerts, even though neither one of us are big on people. We like most of the same foods and restaurants. We’re both deeply devoted to our children and adore our parents. We’re both extremely extroverted, although I would say he’s even more so than I.

The bulk of the chaos comes from my mental issues. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of faults on both sides. I need decisions and actions done right then and there. I want the cleaning done now. I don’t like to let things just sit there. You’ll almost never hear me say, “I’ll get to it eventually.” I want work done first. Relaxing time after. I can’t work when it’s messy. I can’t handle not knowing plans. I can’t handle not having schedules. He absolutely will NOT make an immediate decision. He does not like change. So, when something is pressing that requires his decision, and I want it done NOW, he makes me want to pull my hair out… or smother him with a pillow.

We own our house. It’s in both of our names. And when there needs to be a decision made about the house, it has to be made by both of us. This last one, took him almost 2 months.

This paint pour is us. I’m black and white. He’s the chaos in the middle. I love him, but he’s going to drive me to full on insanity.